9 Months

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9 Months

One of my fondest memories from early in my therapy journey as a client is of telling my therapist that she had 9 months to fix me. I forget what was driving my timeline. I think at that point that was all the time and money I wanted to commit to the cause. It is expensive paying for therapy out of pocket—and a huge time investment! Somehow, I had decided 9 months was as long as I would need to change my bad habits to good and “fix” my life.

I look back on that memory so fondly and humorously now because it was ultimately 8 years that I devoted to that therapeutic relationship and task of self-growth at that chapter of my life. Without a doubt my therapeutic journey transformed me—it taught me deeply and profoundly who I am, and helped me reclaim my childhood memories and repair my familial relationships. It was truly worth every dollar spent and every hour invested!

When I think about therapeutic work metaphorically now as a therapist, I think of 9 months in terms of a gestation period. I often feel that at the end of the first 9 months of treatment, the client and I are birthing the first therapeutic “baby” from our work together. Maybe that looks like some deep insight gained, or a certain knowledge going from “head” knowing to “heart” knowing, or maybe it looks like the early beginnings of shifts in consciousness or boundary setting, or having grieved a profound loss from the past, confided a long held secret, or even seeing oneself more clearly.

I don’t remember what my first therapeutic “baby” was in my own treatment as a client all those years ago. Something tells me that it may very well have been attaching to my therapist and softening my timeline…

Courtney McCubbin

A licensed psychodynamic, integrative, intuitive psychotherapist in Baltimore, MD.

https://dream-well-psychotherapy.squarespace.com/
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